Saturday, July 25, 2015

Summer Skies and Lullabies

As we await the delivery of wedding photographs, we are reminiscing about our happy day. Sunday morning dawned with smokey fog but by noon, the skies peeled back to reveal a lovely Wedgewood blue -  the color that transforms objects into something heavenly, as if one has put on rose-colored glasses.  More than once, I felt a catch in my throat - and a longing for something ...more time...more lullabies...a little girl and her dolly...and for other lives no longer overlap ours.  I also had the sensation of being carried around on a cushioned bed of serenity and happiness.  It was my daughter's wedding day!

I remember the rows of white chairs as we strolled down the aisle of our cloistered grotto. The hydrangeas bowed their heavy heads and the hibiscus danced a shimmy at the whispering sea breezes. My daughter's ivory dress suddenly seemed so bright and fresh in the sunlight, the meaning of it so clear...her perfection, her youth, her joy...and all her hopes for the future represented in the chiffon flower, the encrusted pearls, the simple net veil.  Her golden locks were smoothed out and shiny, skin perfect.  At the simple altar, rosebud lips - the same ones I fretted over so worriedly in a hospital isolate so many years ago - whispered "I love you forever, Mom".  She released my arm with a squeeze and I took my place.

The ceremony was simple and hushed and over way too fast - a promise, a ring, a drama or hype - no fuss -  so very like her.  I watched them pass by to "Here Comes the Sun" but at the end of the aisle, they stopped and waited for me.  Together we three wrapped our arms about each other and smiled into sets of brimming eyes.  And then, my new son murmured something only I heard:  "She's safe... you don't have to worry anymore".  Oh young man, if you but only knew...

The flashbacks have stopped at last.  I am clearing out her room and spreading out my life. When I went to bed that first night there was a card nestled beside my pillow.  On one side was her love letter and on the other, the instructions for changing the time on my clock radio - something I never got the hang of.

More beauty, fashion, books, art, and life posts coming up...back to my usual musings soon!


  1. It all sounds so bitter sweet. What a nice blog for a new beginning. It sounds like you have a very nice son - in-law who deserves your daughter. Cheers!

  2. You seem to be describing my daughter. That's something she would do...a heartfelt thank you on one side, instructions for resetting the clock on the other. I'm very pleased and proud to call my son-in-law a loving member of the family too.

  3. Donna, you have a wonderful blog. I found it through Dewena's Window. I understand what you are feeling. I have one daughter left at home with me. My other 4 daughters have all been married, some divorced and all 4 of them are moms. I wish for them happiness and a peaceful life.

  4. Thank you friends....Gail, I remember you telling me that about your son-in-law and I remember hoping for that too. Thank you Deb...your understanding is so welcome. Cherre and Jacqueline, I thank you so much for your regular visits.

  5. I *did* try to leave a kudo for this lovely post, Donna, but the @#$# internet thwarted me. So, here is my praise. I do love this and understand the feelings that come to a single mom when she surrenders her beloved child to marriage. new start for you...and her. Much love to you both as you launch onto new seas! Fair skies to you both!