Friday, February 19, 2016
I have long adored J.M. Barrie's tale of Peter Pan and was delightfully charmed when Peter said he would wait for us between sleep and awake - the space where dreams are remembered and love is endless. My brother called that drowsy spot BooBoo Land, a cozy suspended state between dual worlds. Anyone who has experienced anesthesia may well know that warm and fuzzy place too. But as I found out recently, there is nothing warm and fuzzy about an in-between land where one waits for medical test results. Scary medical tests.
Helping a loved one cope in the medical In-Between is as good as residing there yourself. You want to take away the pain, the agony...you want it to be you and not them. The endless "what-if's" expand and seep into every crevice of every thought...until the mind is bubbling and spouting like spreading lava. Or perhaps I should just say I understand the phrase, "waiting to exhale" like never before.
My dear sister and I were in the In-Between for several weeks. I'll stop here to tell you, she's going to be fine. But the not-knowing nearly did us in. And it got worse until it got better - to make it even more agonizing, we dealt with an appalling number of apathetic medical office staff, dropped phone calls, a doctor's sudden vacation departure...it was hell.
One night, I googled "how to cope while waiting for medical test results" and surprisingly found something called, "A Healing Prayer for a Sister Awaiting Medical Tests Results". It was sweetly comforting and genuine and I shared it with my sis. But there is no really good information on coping with life in the In-Between although I know it's a place nearly everyone gets to visit.
Throughout, my sister and I did learn a few things. Numero Uno is that one must have hope however that manifests itself in your life (i.e., the found prayer). Next, I would be careful with whom you share. I cannot tell you how many people responded with an immediate "Yikes!" when I described what was going on. I'll be very careful next time. As best as one can, sticking to a routine is helpful as well as ice cream - the creamy full-fat kind.
In the end, my sister found out she will be made as right as rain. The relief was immense. And because she had been suspended for so long, she was exhausted. So yesterday, she took the first flight out of In-Between and landed in BooBoo.
With love...I met her there.
PS: Would love to hear how you coped on your trip to the In-Between.